Saturday, May 28, 2011

Hermione at BYU. The perfect post.

So this would be amazing, it's a dream, but I've been speaking in a british accent all night thinking how amazing it would it's going be typed up. Let me take you away to a place...

I finally watched all the Harry Potter's. Back a while ago, I couldn't give a darn about them, but I watched them and loved them, well they were alright I guess..... So my friend sends me a link for the trailer of the last movie and I'm thinking...sweet. It was on imdb. So I'm looking at some of the things for the movies. Finally, I start checking out the actors...and actresses.

So yeah...I check out Emma Watson. Probably my favorite thing in the movies is the love triangle between her, Ron, and Harry (not so much Harry). So I read the little bio on her, who knows how acurate those things are, even though I trust most of it. I'm reading some things, she seems lively. She knows french... Tight. Como estas? Went to a bunch of schools in England. She couldn't have earrings til she was 15...which says something good about her upbringing. She's from France, lived in England...I knew someone who lived in England. She likes the arts...who doesn't? I'm a design know...yadda I get to the bottom of her current events and read that she's in the process of switching schools, which came down from her publicist or here it goes.

Emma Watson come to BYU. It's a first rate education and I think you'd be treated like a real person. Which, if I know fame correctly.... ahem...Jimmer, is exactly why you leaving your current school...or things of that sort. Listen, you can't find a school with better morals and still having just as much fun, if not even more. No lie miss Watson. And it's darn cheap...that probably isn't your biggest concern, but it is challenging and our School of Art is renowned. BYU graduates are everywhere and sometimes are the leads, in fashion, design, sports, broadway, business, and medicine, you name ite.

Now, I know what you are thinking...whatever would just want to date me. To which I say, maybe...and probably...but us RM's (return missionaries for the LDS church, ever heard of them? BYU is filled with them) are different, just ask around...haha we actually want a good wife and good family, because family and having a family is the ultimate joy in life... That's just how we are. So there, I'm a for sure brotha. You would be treated with the utmost respect, but I would have to see your in your element, I couldn't just commit myself. If you are stuck up, you're done...easy as that. BUT. Come play kick ball at FHE...and its ok if you aren't good at it. I'll have to take you to the Creamery. You gotta try Graham Canyon! It's ice cream and it's delish. Yeah...on our dates I'd have to speak in a british accent...Like...come on, obviously, don't be daft. You'd have to come to our ward. Our Bishop is pretty amazing. Everything is great. I'm not going to lie...but how sick would it be to have Hermione Granger chilling in our apartment, in little ol' Provo? But trust me, you'd come here and laugh, it'd be amazing. Mormon humor is unlike anything, its hilarious. Just a bunch of sober people just trying to have laughs. You might think you know fun...but I'm telling you. Just come here. You'd be treated like a queen...

I'm here to tell you that I'm not impressed by the money, the fame, any of that, because Emma, you are a woman...... and an individual and in God's eyes those things "perish with thee". Sure, definitely, of course, I feel like I would have been comforted when you put your head on Harry's shoulder after he found his parents tombstone. That would've put all my troubles at ease. It was dag-gum cute. One of my favorite quotes is, "The pure hearted love from a pure hearted girl is one of the most inspirational things in life." I believe it whole heartedly, especially after watching your struggles and triumphs in the movies. It was inspiring. I wanted to be a better guy.

So there you have it. BYU. It would be worth it. I garuantee it, nay, absolutely garuantee it. It would definitely be worth a tour. I feel like we have some of the best and brightest people in the world here...all good kids looking to do good and be their very best, you'd fit right  in.

By the way, in case you weren't told are gorgeous.  :)

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

"For goodness sake...soft hands..."

Ok this is just a short post that I feel needs to be posted..I've been working on a real post. It's a rant, which happens with me and my roommates from time to time. So we are driving home from our luncheon, after running some errands, and for some reason we get on the subject of soft hands. Maybe from the Mighty Ducks, the subject's beginning is lost to me. Maybe Stu's hand touched my hand....who knows... So I was like ok. Let's think this through. <<<Rant begins>>>

One ex ex, so not my recent ex but my ex a while ago. We are chilling and I go to grab her hand. All the while I'm thinking, this is going to be great. I'm going to grab her hand and it's going to be feathery soft. Much to my surprise, it was like...rough... I don't know what you all ladies do that makes your hand feel like egyptian cotton, but keep it on. I was startled. I was like, "what do you do, bail hay? bare handed? Wash your hands with steel wool?" It was like reaching my hand into the fiery depths. It was like holding a desert copperhead snake.

Now...there are some distinct things that girls need to have constant. Girl's hands are expected to be heavenly... I hope I'm not asking much. I'm just saying it was a little scarey. And it was only this one girl. Everyother girl's hand that I've felt was fine. So this is probably not a finger pointing thing. 99% of girls, I feel, got it. But for those of you who don' be freaking us guys out, get that checked out.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Mother's Day Post = Church Talk Snippets...Run and Tell That.

Well...yet again I'm called to speak on either Mother's Day or Father's Day. This has been a constant in my life since the mission. Three years straight! Not that I'm complaining...... a lot.....haha <---- Joke--- For those of you who need joke clarification haha  <----Joke too----. But its getting pretty crazy. How much can you really say about the subject? Well turns out there is plenty. So here it is! Well some of it. It's all based off the talk by Jefferey R. Holland entitled, Place No More for the Enemy of My Soul.

You remember the talk.... He started by talking about three women who approached him in an airport, who all had failed marriages due to infidelity.

I feel, first, to say the same thing Elder Holland said when he quoted Jacob. “It grieveth me that I must use so much boldness of speech … before … many … whose feelings are exceedingly tender and chaste and delicate.” 1 But bold we need to be. It is challenging for me to talk about these things, not just pornagraphy which ruined these marriages, but things I see amongst us single-folk as well.

I'll spend a minute on pornagraphy. It is nothing. It will grab you, and destroy you. It yields no fruit, no progress, nothing of any value and if you really want, it can leave you single and miserable for all time. Because I garuantee no person, male or female, headed toward the celestial kingdom will wait for someone bound by this sin, who cannot let go.

The thing is is I don't want to necessarily address pornagraphy and its vices. But there are some things I do want to address that are more common around us (BYU kids). And then I'll talk about some better things.
Particularly this is even harder for me to talk about on Mother's day.

Fidelity is huge. The best way to prepare ourselves for a lasting marriage…is being comfortable with being alone. If we, by ourselves, are ok, we are keeping the commandments, being productive, doing missionary work, then really we are preparing to be the spouse we want to be. We cannot expect that someone will come in and change us and fill the gaps. We can’t expect that at all. Besides, fidelity in a marriage is what you do when your husband or wife is not around as well as when they are around. I would also like to echo the words of Lynn Robbins at stake conference, when he said, “If a person cheats on you in anyway, before or after being married, how can you ever trust it won’t happen again.” He especially hinted toward before being married, since that is the stage we are at in life.

 It’s the fact of becoming as the Lord is. Joseph Smith said, “If He walks a straight path, you have to walk a straight path. If He endures all pain, you have to endure all pain.”

To put it bluntly, I want to share with you something I hold dear to my heart. When I was first called to be a district leader I got to meet Elder Mervn B. Arnold of the Seventy. After spending some time with him and seeing some of the things he did, we found out in a very real way that he is called of God. His voice still echoes in my ears. I don't know what its like to live with a army general but I can imagine it would be pretty much like the hour or so me and some other district leaders and zone leaders got at 7am on the day of zone conference. I got there thirty minutes early. Went into the high council and sat there silently. When he walked into the room there was silence. 15 til 7 he shut the doors and didn't let many in after that. We began with prayer. When it was over, he stood up and in a way I'll never forget started talking about the women in the church and the women in our lives and who would eventually be in our lives. He was loud, firm, and pounded the table in front of him. I'll never forget what he said, he looked up, didn't look at any one of us, his face sort of quivered and got teary eyed, and with his most raised voice of the day said, "ELDER'S IF YOU DON'T LIKE A GIRL, YOU DON'T TOUCH HER!" He hit that table so hard, I was scared to death. I knew that he meant though, you don't touch them, not in any way, big or small. He coupled that with some other admonitions, some other really amazing stories and we closed.

Part of the design world is when you design something, there is clear message about your product and its purpose. I mean what if you had a hair dryer that looked like a refrigerator? Or better yet...and more practically speaking a door handle where you don't know whether to push or pull? I hate that. Then apply that to something that really matters...relationships and tender feelings...and then, whoaaa, playing with some serious things.  Fidelity is that idea. 

Which brings me to my next point. I play basketball. My favorite hoops movie is White Man Can't Jump. Something about the 90's and basketball just seems so much better than basketball now. Basketball was fresh then and just becoming what it is today. Ok. So there is a good quote at the end...The white guy is like..."Listen I got a good jumper." His black friend was like, "You can say you have a lot of things when you you can't put a cat in the oven and call it a biscuit." We can't keep saying we have something when we don't.

That's the point of this talk is how we should treat eachother. The Spirit of Mother's Day is honouring women. Especially those who have given themselves to loving and nuturing us growing up.

It was actually my Dad that taught me how to honour women. I shared this story last year, but however this is a new whatever. If you know me well...I like to be different...I like to think outside the box. Do new the fresh Prince? no? OK...sometimes I think I'm th fresh Prince... Don't hate. SO. My first valentine's day home we are fixing up what my Dad calls "Border Bowls"...I dunno its like...fajita chicken resting on a bed of chips, with all the fix'ns... he says its something from Taco Bell...I dunno...its delicious though. So he's chopping things and he's like, "Jake I haven't got flowers yet. Here is some money go buy Mom something nice." So what goes through my mind? Oh here's my chance...let's be creative! I like to think that's a good thing I have going for me. I got to the store and get this chill like tulip thing with this nice glass vas. It was so nice super designy. So I bought it...I'm bringing it home...I've never seen my Dad so mad....he said,  "NO. You go and get a two dozen roses right now! Are you kidding me Jacob?" That's how I know my Dad is mad...I become Jacob and not Jake. So he hands me more money and kicks me out the door. Almost literally.

I learned something that day. Of course roses are the correct choice. The flower that shows love in the best way and shows the most respect. I've never felt more embarassed. My stupid yet edgey tulip there next to this barage of roses, sitting there majestically.

 That was a huge lesson for me. I feel like my Dad's generation is so much better than mine. My Father is the one I look to for stability, my Mother as well...but Dad's common sense way of seeing everything is the best. He always has the best way of saying things. Mom is just good at being the comfort...Dad will just say...Yea or Nay...and is almost always right. He'll just cut it...whether or not its what I want to hear. haha Love it.

But instead of talking about the bad...I want to talk about all that is good. Then we can shoot for that."It's better to shoot for the moon and hit the roof than shoot for the roof and hit the garbage can." One of my favorite mission quotes.

Well...that's that...the rest is quotes from my parents about their marriage...which are pretty funny. You have to be in Sacrament meeting to hear it. I feel like some who read my blog are too close to my parents and they don't need to hear this stuff...but BYU students...probably won't meet my parents they get some great things. Love it!  I was thinking about including a quote from my dear Mom...who deserves more than just one day of celebration...but nah. This should suffice...I might add more when I read this again. But...yep! Much love Mother's!!! <3