HOT MEAL!!! And not microwave hot either...we are talking stove cooked or crock pot.
Fair.
Kidding...but a good way to start a blog. You are captured, admit it. So this is a quicky but a goody.
I feel like on my list of things all girls should have is a soft voice. We were conversing and we have all agreed on a girl who is quite beautiful. Only one of us has heard her voice though. She is a consesus hunny, but the one that has heard her speak voted out because she had a smokers voice. Just John Wayne stuff. Louis Armstrong. James Earl Jones. Sometimes girls come in with that crackling voice and it's scarey. Like a permanent rasp. That's unfortunate. You just don't want that in a woman. It's rare that a girl doesn't have a pretty voice.
But really. That and really loud laughing. A girl needs a good laugh. If she comes out cackeling, it's no good. I can't tell you how annoying loud laughing is, but really. Nothing is less attractive to me then a girl laughing obnoxiously loud. I heard a girl laughing through the ceiling the other day. And I said no. Too loud. I couldn't find my ear buds fast enough. Knives. Knives to my ears. Shut up with yourself...no one is that funny. Especially....well I'll stop there.... I also hate when it's fake. It makes me want to punch babies, just ginger babies. That's the devil's water...take a drink and your thrist ain't quenched.
Finally. Girl comedians. Not funny.
(Ladies calm down. If a guy has a squeaky voice...it's all over. Fortunately, I can count on my hand the number of people with this sad dissorder.)
http://www.darwindating.com/
ReplyDeleteI think you need this.
Your girl comedian comment is invalid. Tina Fey. Amy Poehler. Ellen DeGeneres. Aubrey Plaza. Enough said.
Fair. But probably calm down. And probably won't read it.
ReplyDeleteI've actually started to read your blog posts more since they're usually pretty true and worth reading. It's a good point, just about anybody who has an annoying voice is going to be looked on badly when dating. I have heard a few girls who are funny, but the ones listed by Liz really aren't in my opinion. The only thing I'd say is you might want to give more criticism to the guys too if you're going to heavily criticize girls in your post. haha you might drive away the female readers completely if you only heavily criticize the girls, but if you criticize both genders a bit it'll be funny to everybody. Other than that, funny stuff.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Derek. I though the dating post a long time ago ripped guys enough. But I smell a post in the works.
ReplyDelete