I'm back....

Guess who's back (back back back)....back again(gaingaingain) shady's back. I feel energized. I have a new flanel shirt that'll be wearing tomorrow. I won a freaking pound of candy out of nowhere. How sweet is that? It's pretty sweet. That's the answer.

I mean...I feel great. I'm getting better and better everyday. I'm starting to be more and more excited for the future. I keep loving things that happen. Summer is going to be sick.

It's been called the summer of self-improvement. I believe it.

We started jogging. All 4 of us. I lead the pack and we go where ever. We've found some of Provo's hidden gems. And I just feel strong right now, like I could take anyone down and run forever. It's nice.

I have a goal to be tan this summer. I mean, why not? We are all just trying to be buff and do good things. So...yeah if you see us running on the back roads and I'm shirtless like a beast...yeah...just know thats my goal. Not to look like a tool......and like...maybe don't laugh because I have like a year and a half or more of no tan coming at ya.

We realized something recently. We are boring, but now...we just roll it. At least I came to the conclusion that I need to change. I can't speak for the whole apartment.

I'm going to back to breaking. There are a couple moves that I must get down before I hang up my breakdance shoes.

We are going to San Fransico. We are trying to get a lot of people from the ward to go and make it a sweet road trip. We aren't doing so well in finding people, but we are hopeful.

I don't really know what else, but I want to get stronger. I do know that I'll have a lot time to do whatever I want. Which will be great. It might be my last summer for stuff like that. Actually, it probably definitely is. That's sad. So its time to live out all life goals possible. Wanna join? C'mon the more the merrier.

Well so. What else? Um...dunno. I had some cool thoughts today. I forgot them though. Sometimes I get good thoughts then I see or hear something that I don't like and the good thoughts poof so fast its crazy.

So I also want my testimony to be known. Joseph Smith, next to Isaiah, is the prophet of the restoration. It's just that...it's so real. So true. My testimony burns brighter than it has in a little while. There is a plan for salvation and obedience to the laws and ordinances of the gospel grants that. I was grateful to use my priesthood last weekend. It's not everyday you get to do that. I'm grateful for those oppurtunities. I guess, I'm always suppose to represent the priesthood soooooooo a good word goes a long way, service goes a long way as well. Charity, I like praying for that. and I'm grateful when God hears my prayer for charity.

School is almost coming to a close. I got some pretty sweet assignments. I got some pretty rough things coming up. A full portfolio is going to be due soon. I have very little done. I'm about to be a junior. I got to do some projects over the summer. Just make things. Who knows what. I'm not all certain about the futurity of my life. I do know that my lower back is killing probably because I've been sleeping on the couch. Freak. That's getting lame. I ate dinner with my future family today. At the least the Mom and the sister. I'm going to have a sister. That's pretty cool. Never had one before. Maybe it'll teach me how to be a better guy. I got my pound of chocolate. That was legitimate.

I'm grateful for my family out here. The ID kids, my bro, my roommates and my fhe fam. In no particular order. Well...maybe Joe. It's funny. Every semester seems to have its own unique things happen. Joe and Katelin. Gaining strength. Etc. My roommate coming back. I love that guy. Never met a much better person...except for For Serial Green maybe. haha :)

Also....a little more. I've noticed, and I don't know how this happens, but...sometimes one of my sideburns is longer than the other. How does that even happen? I also wonder how long it is that way. Shoot. And I fix it...just sometimes it sneaks up on me. It's happened throughout my life numerous times...I look in the mirror and kinda do theside to side head movement, like somethings off.

The Joe Blog:.:My Favorite Post

So I decided to write a post about my brother. It got me pumped to think about writing a blog about someone who I have looked up to my whole life.

So Joe and I have had some great times. We grew up playing video games for sure. It would usually be me watching Joe play. I would always talk like I knew what the best games were, as if I played them. Then Joe would actually play them and beat them. He beat Castlevania 3 without dying. How is that even possible at 10 years old? Genius, probably. We conquered GoldenEye, Quarter Back Club 98, Hang Time, Jackle, Halo (all like, 8), Modern Warfare etc. He also really liked Resident Evil.......I never really got that one. Also, want to see something spectacular? Ask Joe to play Star Fox FX on Super Nintendo...its Luna Lovegood how good he is.

He was always smarter. He took harder classes. I took the minimal to get the advanced degree. It seems to me like I never saw him in school, ever. He was two years older. He got picked on sometimes. I hated that. I remember seeing it happen once in middle school. So lame. Those kids had no idea. They were considered the popular kids, but what did they know? Some challenges are hard...but I can never imagine getting picked on in school. (However, Joe has a great life and well...the gospel...) He did befriend one of them, Chandler, who really helped all that. Those two are hilarious together.

I never got much of that. Joe and I hardly ever made the basketball team. Haha...we laugh about it now. I remember some of those kids coming out with us to play at the church and we smoked them. Haha. Joe played one year of football. I'll never forget him catching a pass that he tipped to homself. I was stoked.

Also...Joe always surprised me. Like...the Star Fox thing...but...it seems like one day, out of nowhere, Joe was just amazing at baseball. Yeah, he led the little league in home runs one year. He hit one so far out of the park that the only thing that stopped the ball was the tree it hit. It was a shot. I'll never forget it just lifting off...and just going up and up until my lame sauce eyes couldn't see it anymore. Most of the time, he wouldn't make it on the All-Star team, because the players picked the team and they didn't pick him, but the coaches would call him. He was just that good.

Anyway. Joe was always stronger too. We fought with our fists I think twice. I learned pretty fast. I always thought I could take him in a heart beat. Basically, I thought....well I act tough (I was always acting like the tough guy) I should actually be tough right? Wrong! Joe once threw me over his back. I came at him again...and he did the same move again and threw me over his back. I'll never forget that. I had no chance. I remember, because he had just made the JV basketball team and was doing basketball workouts. Naturally, he was stronger than me, because I worked out..........never?... Sounds right. (EXCEPT in later years!!! I'm stronger now...sheesh...) I also once tried to punch Joe...he just pushed me down and held me down. Embarassing.

Joe is the first missionary in either side of the family. I honestly believe that if it wasn't for him going I probably wouldn't have gone either. It's funny. My parents and I knew so little about Joe's plans. Essentially, he just came home one day and was like, "Got my mission call. I'm going to Salt Lake." I remember laying on the couch...poking my head up and saying......what?......He did it all with so little knowledge to us, especially me. We talked...just not much as we should. All I remember is, Joe, Institute, and some girl. I was a bit preoccupied with my band and working, buying a huge drum set and probably some girl that I worked with.

Joe will soon be the first to get married. That's just crazy. It's nice to finally see that. Joe has been through a lot to get there. He's counciled me a lot about it all. He was telling me about a conversation he had with his roommate because he had just left a relationship. He asked my brother how it felt, what it was like to have someone, and how it worked. Joe just said that they put up with eachothers differences. That he, the roommate, needed to learn to be ok with the differences and struggles. And don't mind them. He also said that it's not what's similar that his fiance and himself have to deal with, its the differences. My Mom said something similar not too long ago. But I feel Joe has been that way for a while. He's such a loving guy. He would have probably married the first girl he dated.

That doesn't sum it up...but it's brief on one of the most stellar people in my life. I could keep writing too. It suffices me to say, though, that he's been nothing short of a great brother.

Generic Blog Post.

I need an outlet for my thoughts and feelings. Journaling just doesn't seem to do it. Maybe its because its on paper, maybe its because it could burn in a fire...who knows. I'm mid-semester of my Sophmore year at BYU. I never thought college would be so hard. I actually never thought anything would be harder than my mission. Well...surprise! It's terribly harder. It started out being a piece of cake. It started out being fun. Then things got complicated. One choice lead to another and then bam...here we are today.

Its kinda stinky that I try to find things to blame it all on. Essentially...I've chosen everything based on the people in my life. And when there is a fork there is always a harder decision. Sometimes I blame bad choices on girls (which I have made a score of them based on that) , but more recently, my major. I was talking to a girl in my class and I told her, "You know...most people just think I'm lame. But most people don't get it. This school and this major actaully does take up most of my life and if it doesn't its because I'm not putting in enough effort. It's not that I don't want to be doing other things, its just that this is consuming." She agreed and added, "Most people think 'well, yeah right, its not that bad, you can find time' ", but it literally is, I literally could, but shouldn't.

As I'm moving to my Junior year, I think back to how much has been ripped from me because of this major. I'm hoping it all becomes worth it. One of my best friends said, "School work should be HOT to a girl." Maybe... Maybe its the girl's mixed up priorities. Like...dang. But I like what I do. And perhaps thats not the only reason (I am near sighted. I am a designer. I do write in all caps. I haven't cut my toe nails in a little bit. My hair cut hasn't changed. Sometimes I wear mismatched socks. Occasionally I rewear dirty clothes. Like.... I littered once. ) ...but....

It does add up.

It does take its toll.

Do I feel lame? Yes.

I mean I've been in kinda a rut for some time now. And everytime I think I'm going to get some kind of relief, blam! Suck on this! It's the worst.

What more can I do? I served a mission. I was intense. I'm active...but I don't really have a church calling. I have 100% hometeaching and I try to serve them as much as possible. Like...yeah...I dont have a lot of friends... Most nights I sit at home with my roommates. We talk.... I'm not even good at thinking of stuff to do anymore. I mean, if anyone has some advice lay it down. Shoot me a message. I'm pretty certain there isn't much more I can do. Self-confidence is at an all time low.

Am I being over dramatic? At this point in my life I feel like I can have my Liberty Jail moment. It's almost a right. Where I can cry out, O God where art thou? Where is the pavilion that covers thine hiding place? It's at this moment where I feel like I can say...yeah...maybe I'm not like Job yet...but still Im in a bad spot. I'm tired of hearing the same ol' story. I'm tired of hearing I'll be ok. I'm done with it.

I just want to be ok.

*sigh* and I'm wasn't going to say it...but I feel I'm well within my rights haha... but I miss my best friend.........

A certain person when I first got to BYU...haha actually two people, said something to effect of....like not waiting to say things...and not beating around the bush. They are two of my favorite blog followers.

Summer Vacation is approaching....and thats something. Maybe I'll intern...or sit on my butt all summer and kick it with my boys. Welp so my blog is still doing alright despite my lack of posts...Surprisingly my dating tips blog is still getting hits....haha I did that in June last year. Dang...way to be...way to be.....

End of semester wrap-up 2.

You know what I don't like?

Why do people think that in order to have a good picture you have to over expose the shot? It looks really bad. Who wants a picture where all you can see is eyes, hair and a lip line? I guess there is a background........ But do you know what I'm talking about?

Wanna-be Utah photographers. They pick up a camera, like a Canon Rebel, they don't know what the heck is going on with it, slap it on auto and start clicking away. Better yet, they slap on some random random manuel settings. But you know, whatever floats your boat. <---CLICHE--- Then they throw it through photoshop and smash some funky filter on it. Yuck.

What else annoys me...I just have some pet peeves...I can't sit in a silent room while someone eats cereal.

You can't leave milk out.

Anywho....

Well, this semester was...interesting. I went on a record number of dates. I don't know too many weeks when I wasn't on one. Also...record number of heart breaks. haha Guess that comes with the territory. I think I might be stepping down though from the dating scene for the rest of the semester. We'll see.

The new ward is ok. I say that because some people I see, probably, feel like they don't have a group of friends. That's totally sad. One of my roommates is getting married and that's pretty special. I've had the priviledge of watching that relationship blossom from a friendship to courtship to eternal relationship built on trust. They are way in love. I think they are starting to act like eachother. haha Cute.

He sold his contract, hope we don't get some goofus.  I can't handle that.

I think I got my first A in a gen ed at BYU. Pysch 111. Shoot dang and it only took three semesters.

I've designed a lot of good stuff. Not to mention read some crazy stuff about mythilogical language and origins of cultures. Whack.

I've lost slightly more money than I've gained...by slightly I mean...kinda a sizeable chunk. Ugh.

My hands are drying out...lame dry Utah.

Love my fhe group. haha We have gotten somewhat close.

Holidays.

Halloween. Decent...N'Sync performance....best in show.

Thanksgiving...better than best. Just so good. I mean MVP turkey bowl performance, 18lb turkey, 50+ potatoes, etc, Nickel City, Bow and Arrow, shooting things haha.... shooting people. Does not get any better.

Christmas...I kinda don't want to talk about it. So much I want to do...but...yeah...probably not going to happen. Blah...

Mom and Dad are doing great...Mom's birthday is soon. She's a saint. It's been a hard year. I can't wait to see her.

*sigh* not as much hype this semester. There have been good times, but it feels like we are more settled or something. Not even as much basketball. Meh. That's all I think...I might post stuff as I think of it too.

Soquids.

Listen. Liquid marshmellow is neither solid nor liquid. Therefore it is a soquid. It's pretty much a fact.

If you turn your shirt inside out and wear it...does the back become the front?

I think so.

I wish my roommates were here to bounce ideas off of. Usually I come up with some really good stuff. So. Here I am, mid to late semeseter. What have I learned?

Of course, I always tell it how it is so I'm just going to say it. I understand that guys have to give some effort to catch girls, but some things are just out of control. I've invented a word for it.

Background: So I have a phrase that I got from the "Fails of the week" people. (If you want to know who they are talk to me.) The phrase is "Broing out".

Broing Out - (v.) when two males are seen together talking about or gesturing manly things and just being overall manly for manlinesses sake

Bro Date - (n.) Broing out on the town.

Stupid - (adj.) See above. (It could also be written Stupid - synonym - Bro Date. As well, Sad = Bro Date)

That's wildly off topic, but we are working up to things.

Wing Man - a guy who helps another guy attain to a conversational with a female(s); a male who assists another male in looking way cool when in conversational with a female(s); male A who goes with male B on a group date and A assists B in establishing foundationals with said female(s).

Wing man/men are way good for stuff. I don't know what stuff just you know...any type' stuff.

Ok. New word...and therefore new definition.

Tooling Out (v.) - Recreational activities that involve guys doing lame things just to talk to girl(s), nearly stalking them.

I see this everywhere. I don't know. I'm okay with it. I find it rather odd and off-put doing things that are border line stalking just to talk to a girl. I mean...stalking is weird right? Maybe and maybe not...as we say in InDes any concept is ok if you do it right. So go big or go home. Sometimes. Refer to the dating tips, the disclaimer. Feeeeel it out. Haha oh boy............well.... I feel like this is an awkward point in this blog so.......

TOPIC SWITCH...I do this in my blogs a lot. Maybe one day I will write a blog about how I write blogs. Saying this could exist on a continum. A blog about how I write blogs about how I write blogs, which is a blog in which I analyze my analyzing of my blog writing. Score!

Apartment Random Definitions -

Mud-Blooding It - haha it's when you mess something up or play terrible basketball.

Take it light - My personal favorite. It's like saying take it easy, but obviously cooler obviously (Scott Pilgrim reference).

So that's that's that. Really though, these phrases are mostly used for comic releif <---i before e mispelling. Like, we say new and crazy stuff all the time. It's part of our apartments goal to be masters of the metaphor. Also, we feel it to be a great skill to be able to dictate our feelings at any given time, but not only that, we want to be able to say it in three different ways. You know, tell you it thrice times hence. Perhaps, even articulate our vernacular in the third variability.

Chastity.

So I was in Book of Mormon class. We were starting the book of Jacob. For those of you who don't know that particular section of the Book of Mormon is when Nephi is about to die. The small plates are about to passed down to Jacob the brother of Nephi. The Nephites were starting to fall into some gross wickedness, mainly breaking the sacred law of chastity. For those of you who might be confused with this statement, the law of chastity is not specifically mentioned  as the "law of chastity" in scripture, but we title the Lord saying "thou shalt not commit adultery" as that, a law. The law is that there should be no sexual relations outside the bonds of marriage between a man and woman. No adultery.

But why the law of chastity? We know that our body makes us like God, our spirit makes us like God, and the other thing that makes us like God is our power to procreate. Therefore it is sacred, much like our body and spirit. Why did it take Jacob thirty verses to finally get around to talking about it? Because it is sacred.

Why the law of chastity? Fidelity has no meaning. Abortion is everywhere. Children born to drug addicted mothers etc. Why the law of chastity? The Proclamation to the Family states that children have the RIGHT to be brought up in a loving and nuturing family with a mother and father.

In the class a student said that procreation is like a fire. When harnessed is life giving, even essential. When not safe guarded can be a destroying force.

I bring this up because I feel the Lord is unhappy with the world. Trust is ruined, feelings deeply hurt.  Mosiah 4:29 I will not list all the ways whereby ye may commit sin.

Jacob says there is a way over it, "for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever". I have a firm testimony that Jesus Christ has atoned for the sins of the world. I know that independent of everything and everyone. Wounds can be healed. The words are, and it came to pass...not and it came to stay. Trust in him.

It's our job to be spiritually sensitive to those pictures, images, attire etc. that are wrong and do all we can to block those things and keep our spiritual sensitivity. There is a lot out there that isn't blatent pornagraphy, but does weeken us slightly. And its by these slow degrees, that bigger things are let in. I'm paraphrasing Elder Russell M. Ballard from my notes taken from our stake conference this past weekend. He spoke truth.

Quote-Unquote Stupid Guys.

I heard someone talk about this the other night. This girl said, “Why are guys dumb?”

My response was simple. They aren't, you talk to the wrong guys. Talk to different ones. It’s about the guy being man enough to live the standards of the Church. It’s about guys who aren’t afraid to talk about feelings. It’s about guys who aren’t afraid to commit.  It’s about guys who aren’t about loud laughter, who seek after knowledge and ask questions. It’s about guys who aren’t afraid to do what you want to do, girly or not.

I could point them out all day long, but it’s funny, when I do, they are the first ones to “try” to turn things around. Time and time again, it doesn’t happen. Honestly though ladies, we know what we need to be doing. I’ll add a few last remarks. Watch out for the guy that stands to close, who is a little touchy feely and who talks about things with no meaning or substance. (Just noticed that one recently.)

The most deep brother you’ll find isn’t playing football, though he could be, he’ll be soaked in homework figuring out a math problem. The one that’ll rub your feet at the end of a hard day’s work is found with glasses on in the front row of astrophysics class, or the lead accountant/financial advisor intern for H&R Block.

Life update.

Aside from all that, I'm a Temple worker now and I love it. It's been a great calling and I hope it blesses my family. School is great. I have a great schedule that's not too tough and I'm getting great grades! Money is a little tight, but I'm making it through. I don't know how, but I am. I've met some great people from the new ward. Everything is looking good. Not only that, Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming and that's just cool. Its getting cold in out here, but I like it. In a few weeks it's going to be freezing. Therefore I'm enjoying what little bit of fall there is. I missed hiking Timp again. Lame. We were going to go with some way cool girls from the ward, but the mountain got blasted with snow. Dang. I want that mountain.  Anyway, that's my life to this point. I'm still alive in assasin...so you know...watch yourself FHE group.

One last thing....what up with girls not holding doors for guys? Holy geez...give love to get love...